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  • Writer's pictureCowtown Christian Counseling

Pornography Addiction: Love and Behavior

Updated: Sep 14, 2021

Girl walking by herself sidewalk

People behave towards their greater love. If your spouse is your greater love then you will behave towards her. If your work is your greater love then you will behave towards it, with your time, thoughts, etc.

Pornography addiction is difficult because sometimes you behave towards it when your greater love, work, spouse, is not going well. Sometimes pornography is your greater love and you behave towards it. It can feel like a compulsion at times too; things are going well and then, out-of-nowhere (feels like this), you view porn.

When your ‘greater’ love is not going well, what do you do? Choosing to view pornography can sometimes feel like a momentary decision and not necessarily something that has been building up for hours or days. It is possible to behave differently even if you don’t feel like it though.

A step towards change can be behaving differently even if you don’t love differently in the moment. This begins to break your functional belief of change, “I have to feel differently in order to do differently.” Application of doing differently even if you don’t feel or love differently…...can be applied to many different areas in your life.

The upside to ‘doing differently’ is overtime love begins to follow and your functional belief of how change occurs is different; behaving differently can lead to you feeling and loving differently.

God is always behaving towards you because you are his greater love. He thinks love and does love to you.

Questions to consider:

  1. How do I view change in pornography? Do I need to feel differently in order to experience sobriety? Experience change?

  2. What is my greater love and how does it affect my behavior?

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